Monday, February 13, 2017

How to Rewire your Brain after a Break-Up (so you can surviveValentine's Day)

I remember one February I went through a particularly hellish break-up, which according to research, is really frighteningly common. Sure break-ups are normal, most people have a few of them in their lifetime, but the scary part is the staggeringly high number of breakups that happen in February. In fact, more couples break up in February than in any other month with the Tuesday before Valentine’s Day being the most popular day on the calendar for couples to call it quits. My boyfriend at the time broke up with me two days before Valentine’s Day in Las Vegas, and I will never forget sitting slumped on the carpet in the hallway of the 11th floor of the Mandalay Bay hotel and casino. 

Break-ups are rough but they are the absolute worst in February. When you go through a break up, all those “I feel good” chemicals like dopamine and oxytocin that are so prevalent when you were dating now start racing out of your system looking for the nearest exit. Your brain is literally depletes itself of good feelings, while cortisol, the stress hormone, rushes to move into the newly vacated real estate in your brain. 

This leaves you:

  • exhausted, because your adrenal glands are activated 
  • with a weaker immune system because dopamine and oxytocin actually help regulate that sort of thing 
  • quite possibly with head and body aches as inflammation in your body soars 
  • with an overall feeling of gloom and doom, because breakups suck and now you are sad.

But it’s not all bad news (I mean, it is mostly bad news but we have to find a silver lining somewhere right???) because the brain is made to heal itself and recover. Your brain literally knows how to create new pathways. While the month of February might be screaming at you to remember you ex every time you see another red heart or another special for a couples massage, keep in mind your brain is ultimately on your side. 

Here are five things you can do to help re-wire your brain while going through a break-up this month:

Pick Out A Mantra 

Whether it’s “this feeling will pass” or “I can do this,” mantras are powerful ways to stay present and mindful in the midst of chaos. And right now, your brain is in chaos. Repeat your mantra daily when you start to spin or feel anxious or fantasize about ways to seek revenge on your ex. As you repeat your mantra your brain will begin creating a new neural pathway that will be your lifeline when the gloom and doom hits. 

Try Something New
This one is a non-negotiable. Your brain is great with memories, especially emotionally charged memories. So the goal here is to create a new memory. Join a class and learn about art, music, or writing. Go on a trip to somewhere you’ve never been. Try a food you’ve never tasted before. Right now your brain needs new and novel experiences. Don’t be heading out to you and your ex’s favorite date spot or go-to coffee shop. At least for the first month, try something new and avoid the other stuff. There will be enough that will remind you of them (like the gaping hole in your heart). Don’t make it harder on yourself. 

Go Outside
According to this research getting out of the house and into nature can decrease blood flow to the subgenual pre-frontal cortex or the part of the brain that likes to obsess about stuff. If you want the part of your brain that loves ruminating to quiet down a bit consider getting out into nature. Take a hike, take a walk along the beach, or head to a local flower garden. Fresh air, new scents and a little movement in nature does wonders for the brain. 

Hang Out With Some Fur-Babies (read pets, not especially hairy infants…)
There are plenty of ways to volunteer when it comes to animals. The Humane Society offers many ways such as dog walking, pet bathing, administering medicine or cleaning out kennels to get involved. If you have a friend who has a pet, offer to take them for a walk. Pet owners (as I am one) love this. Sometimes you just need to snuggle with a fuzzy little dog or cat where you feel unconditional acceptance and love. When the brain feels safe and loved, the brain relaxes and this alone helps us to heal. 

I know many of these could fall under the “self-care” category but I want to address basic self-care such as eating, hydrating and sleeping. It’s easy to turn to coping skills that help us numb (i.e. drugs, alcohol, excessive shopping, under-eating or over-eating) but this is not the time to be cavalier about self-care, your immune system is already vulnerable. Lack of apatite might be normal after a loss, but your brain still desperately needs you to eat. The brain is made of fat and when don’t eat the foods we need, part of our brain begins to shut down. The same goes for sleep. When we don’t sleep there are all kinds of side effects such as increased blood pressure, impaired brain activity and a lowered immune system. If these things are not in place your brain will have trouble healing. Do what you need to make sure you have this part covered whether that’s reaching out to a trusted friend, a support group or a therapist. 


  1. Getting back my husband after separation was very difficult for me because he went to settle down with another woman, i had two children for him already. I have tried to make contacts with him to come back home yet he refuse, each time i look at his kids i become more sad and i needed him at my side to raise the children together. I was so lucky i finally got the help i needed, i went on a search and i saw Dr Mack contact. People say he is a very powerful spell caster that he can put an end to relationship problem, causes that disturb destiny, he is also good in curing different diseases. He is such a special man gifted with powers and reliable spell caster that have a cure to most problems of life. My husband is back to me and we are living happily as it used to be, Dr Mack have done what i could never have done with my own powers.

    (1) If you want your ex back.
    (2) if you always have bad dreams.
    (3) If you want to be promoted in your office.
    (4) If you want women/men to run after you.
    (5) If you want a child.
    (6) If you want to be rich.
    (7) If you want to tie your husband/wife to be yours forever.
    (8) If you need financial assistance.
    (9) How you been scammed and you want to recover you lost money.
    (10) if you want to stop your divorce.
    (11) if you want to divorce your husband.
    (12) if you want your wishes to be granted.
    (13) Pregnancy spell to conceive baby
    (14) Guarantee you win the troubling court cases & divorce no matter how what stage
    (15) Stop your marriage or relationship from breaking apart.
    (16) if you have any sickness like ( H I V ), (CANCER) or any sickness.
    once again make sure you contact him if you have any problem he will help you. his email address is ( contact him immediately

  2. I was in total despair when I found Dr. Todd. My life was going terrible and I didn't know if I was coming or going. I had just gone through a rough divorce, wasn't making enough money to sustain me and my children, and my 17 year old son had just gone to jail for the first time. When I talked to him, I immediately found a sense of peace. He was very honest with me and I could feel that. He also told me that everything would be okay. After my work began, things began to change. My bills were all caught up, the relationship I was in became much stronger, I was never FLAT broke, and my son was released from jail earlier than we expected!! I also completely got over the failed marriage and began to move on. And, received a better position at my job which will cause an $800 per month increase!! I felt completely comfortable with the work that was being done because I was always encouraged by Dr. Todd. is the BEST!!!!

  3. I’m Rebecca…..

    Want to share my story of testimony for what DR Odinani Owelle did for me, i just can’t stop thanking him enough.

    My son Adrian, has being an alcoholic for more than two years now and has being sleeping in night clubs for God knows how long, can’t recall the last time he spent a whole day in the house.

    Thank God for aligning my paths with DR Odinani Owelle , I really don’t know how it happened. . . . . . I happened to believe in all he told me and after I narrated the ordeal about my son to him, he said he was going to caster a spell on him. At first, I was afraid that something bad would happen to my son but summoned courage and went through the process with him.

    Special thanks to DR Odinani Owelle my son is now the best in the universe, he doesn’t keep late nights anymore, no more alcohols and bad companies. He is completely back to sanity.

    Thank you so much DR Odinani Owelle ……you can contact him via Email; ( or Wh

    atsApp him on his number +1573 206-9284... 2) Lost Love Spells
    3) Divorce Spells
    4) Marriage Spells
    5) Binding Spell.
    6) Breakup Spells

  4. I am Williams From UK. I wish to share my testimonies with the general public about what this man called Dr Odinani Owelle from Africa has just done for me , this man has just brought back my lost Ex LOVER to me with his great spell, I was having a relationship to this woman we were together for a long time and we loved our self’s but when she was unable to give me a child for 4 years she left me and told me she can’t continue any-more then I was now looking for ways to get her back until a friend of mine told me about this man and gave his contact email to me ( then you won’t believe this, when I contacted this man on my problems he prepared this spell cast, and bring my lost lover back,thank you once again the great DR Odinani Owelle for what you have done for me, if you are out there passing through any of this problems listed below: you can contact him via Email; or WhatsApp him on his number +1573 206-9284... .......1. Getting your lover or husband back
    2. Spiritual bulletproof
    3. Training
    4. Money spell
    5. Long life spell
    6. Prosperity spell
    7. Protection spell
    8. Get a job spell
    9. Becoming a manager spell
    10. Get a huge loan without paying any fee spell
    11. Getting your scam money back


  5. It’s no secret that most men only want one thing, right?

    Well it turns out that’s not only wrong, but may actually be the root of many failed relationships.

    In fact, the one thing men are universally obsessed with...

    Is actually a feeling he’s been chasing his whole life.

    It’s an elusive combination of emotion and biological drive that’s rarely satisfied in life or love.

    ===> (The secret obsession that makes men fall in love) - (What men look for in “The One”) <=====

    And when you know how to satisfy this life long obsession...

    He will make it his life long mission to cherish and please you...

    And he will pursue your love to the ends of the earth.

    Here’s a video you won’t want to miss that shows you how to become your man’s deepest obsession:

    ===> (The most powerful emotion for men) - (Men fall in love with women who do THIS): <=====